First Day of First Grade

 

I sort of feel like kindergarten was our "practice year".  And now this first grade thing is the real deal. You know - that feeling of "I better get it right or I might ruin him for life!".  No pressure or anything. First grade is also uncharted territory for my teaching career. I taught kindergarten and I student taught in both third and sixth grade. I LOVED third grade and dreamed of teaching second...the one I have always thought of as "the perfect grade". I have zero experience with first grade, and, I can't even remember my own year of being a first-grader. I'm pretty sure it was the WORST year of my whole education. I might have actually un-learned things that year. I do remember sitting in circle time with one of the four teachers I had that year (and remember not their names nor faces) and I "got in trouble" for talking to the girl next to me. I don't think I really got in trouble, but my teacher said my name and told me to be quiet! I cried. (I was THAT kid...the kind you could look at with an ounce of disapproval and bring her to tears.) I'm pretty sure this "scarring memory" is the root of my reservations to speak out in any group of people! You can also see my tendencies toward struggling with an ideal of perfection. I'll save that for another day.

Back to our first day of first grade.

A few late nights and a couple long days of planning got me ready. We celebrated with banana splits the night before. Might be our new night-before-the-first-day tradition. EJ got to wear his new "school clothes", and I made them pose for pictures.

banana splits

 

NOT to be left out...though I had taken her "tot school" pics the week before.

Now before you go off thinking that our first day of first grade was all cherries and pie...I'll have you know it was one of the hardest mommy/teacher days of my life...and FORCED me to remember that I CANNOT do this school thing, (or anything for that matter), in my own strength. All the planning and celebrating and attempting to make it special and exciting dissipated into a chaotic frenzy of difficult attitudes, whining, moaning, screaming, a sleepless baby, and a toddler who decided to choose the most inconvenient day of the year to "use the potty". My idylic dreams of smiling children attentively listening and dreamily following my neat schedule kinda shattered into a million pieces at exactly 7:42am. And I was ever thankful I had gotten up early (thank you, O, for waking me at exactly 4:42am) to get my heart before the Lord. Whew. I need Him. And though I was tempted to forget everysinglereason we chose to homeschool and sign him up down the street...I can look back on that day (a whole 3 days ago) without regret for HOW I mommied and taught. God gave me so much grace. And you know...sometimes I forget that I can't plan and prepare my way into the perfect scenario. God gave me four extremely vivid reminders (HD, 3D, and surround sound) that while planning and preparation are good...they do not replace my need to depend completely on my Creator. And...there's more to life than reading and writing...you know...things like self-control, kindness, patience, self-control...

Tilly's first day of "Tot School". A dear friend takes her twice a week with 4 other little ones and she does stories, crafts, snacks, and games centered around a theme. Tilly LOVES it and never hesitated to be dropped off. Two-and-a-half and she's a "bring it on" kinda gal. So spunky and confident. I could learn some stuff from this little treasure!

She thinks she's a cat...

punk...fitting pic for day #1

So, I didn't really get any pictures of the chaos. In the moments (there were many) the camera was truly the last thing on my mind! So look past the appearance of perfection and know that our first day was the REAL DEAL. This homeschool thing is gonna be HARD. Maybe the cherries and pie will come in 18 years...when I pray we can look back and know that we walked with God and led our children into His footsteps, and see a harvest from generous sowing.